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I’m back!

Where do I begin?

I guess apologies are in order for abandoning this blog for the past year. To be totally candid, I just chose TV time over everything else (writing included). I found that I could binge watch shows again, so I dedicated all the (very little) spare time I have to catching up on my shows. Believe me, I wanted so bad to write. But like what I always say for everything, I just didn’t have the energy to do it. 

But that need to write has finally caught up with me. There’s just SO much that has happened in the past 10 months and most of it, mostly about how Elle has grown (literally and figuratively!), just needs to be jotted down.

For the interest of my friends here (I doubt that there are any, but I’m doing this anyway), let me catch you up on what went down since I stopped writing: Jan finally came home from military training (but not after 3 months as we all expected. It lasted 8 freakin’ months), I went to the States and left Elle for almost a month (the longest that I’ve been away from her), Elle now has a head full of hair (SO MUCH YAY!) that we can tie into a dainty ponytail and she now weighs 19 kilos and stands at 3’1” with still two months to go before she turns two.

Whew, now that I’ve said that out loud I realize that wasn’t much—at least for my life (I have a really boring life outside of my being a mom). But for Elle, it has been the most colorful 2016! Especially now that her dad is home (at least for the most part).

Anyway, if that wasn’t enough to make you realize how long I was gone, here’s a better idea.

The last time I posted an entry, Elle looked like this:

 

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Elle at 1 year two months.

And 10 months after, she is now this:

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Elle at 1 year and 10 months.

Told you that was a long time! But I’m going to make up for it. I just don’t want another special moment in Elle’s life pass and not write about it.

 

 

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Adventurous Celestine

Thanks to Facebook memories, I was reminded that a year a go Elle’s world was limited to just two things: feeding and sleeping. No smiling or laughing and all the more, no pilya moves yet. It comes at a perfect timing, because it puts into perspective what we’re experiencing right now: riot (in a fun way, of course)!

From just the four corners of our room, Elle now enjoys her afternoon on the streets…a wee bit much. In fact, she doesn’t even want to go home anymore from her routine walks outside. I got a text from my mother last week while I was away on vacation: “Sobrang kulit ni Elle. Gusto na sa labas tumira. (Elle is so stubborn. She wants to live outside.)” I can just imagine the flailing that ensued when they told her it’s to go back inside. Haha! But it’s exactly what kind of childhood I want her to experience—especially in this day and age when kids would rather play with their iPads. Big part of mine was spent outside with my friends—taking turns learning how to ride my rainbow-colored bike, playing all the games we could think of, and just getting dungis out there. So I’m hoping this is a good start for the little one.

 

Elle and her Ates. 🙂

 

Since Elle also apparently thinks she has mastered the art of walking (But no, she hasn’t really. She still gets out of balance sometimes), she figures she has no use for us anymore and always swipes away any hand that tries to guide her when we’re out for walks. (Like the big boss that she is! Haha.) What we do is we try to hold her shirt to at least get a grip of her, though it’s pointless once she breaks into a run.  So you know how this ended…with her first booboo! That’s what she gets for thinking she’s a three-year-old stuck in a one-year-old body. (In fact, when you ask her how old she is, she holds up her finger as 1 but she says “three” and I have no idea where she got that.)

 

I will kiss your booboo, Elle. 🙂

 

Well, she didn’t cry that much, and it didn’t seem like the scratch bothered her the rest of the night because she was back to her old naughty baby self in no time.

With the kind of adventurous baby Elle is, though, I expect this is just first of many booboos were going to deal with. Especially that Elle also grown fond of doing things that make me feel like I’m going to have a heart attack; She climbs up the seat of her bike and likes to do her dancing from there, she climbs the couch always in haste and goes down from it with head and hands first. (All done with her mischievous smile.) Her idea of playtime always has to be something that involves us chasing her. (A split second can spell disaster so we have to keep our eye out on her at all times!)

But I’m really not complaining (at least for now or since I’m not the one who takes care of her the entire day). I’m enjoying seeing Elle growing up to be such an outdoorsy, adventurous soul. I wouldn’t have it any other way!

Baby biking.

Baby biking.

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Oh tantrums! A stubborn mother makes a stubborn baby

The apple really does not fall far from the tree.

I was a difficult child. I’ve heard stories—horror stories—about how I ran off nannies one by one just with my sheer stubbornness and general bitchiness—as a kid! And growing up didn’t make me less bitchy or stubborn, and neither did getting married or having a kid.

So I am not all surprised to see Celestine grow up to be a spitting image of her mother. If her bitch fits at 10 months old are signs of things to come, then I sure got a loooong lifetime ahead of me. I’d like to think that I should not complain, though, because I don’t mind raising a feisty lady. As they say, Well-behaved women seldom make history.

Oops, I’m getting way ahead of myself.

While it seems amusing right now coming from a baby, I really have to find a way to nip these tantrums in the bud, or else they are going to worsen. And they seem to already have.

Normally, Celestine—who is turning one in less than 2 months—would usually just stomp or drop her feet her big feet repeatedly or just cry and scream (yes at the same time) when she wants something she couldn’t get. But this afternoon during one of our pre-bedtime playtimes, Celestine introduced a new way of throwing a fit — She pinched me really hard using both her hands and then bit down on my tummy twice just because I refused to give her my phone. My mom had to intervene and had to let her cry it out because I still don’t know how to enforce discipline. I mean, how DO you discipline a 10-month-old? It’s not like she understands what “no” really means (She literally laughs at me every time I say no. I have proof).

It’s not really knowing what to do I’m struggling with, it’s HOW to do what needs to be done. Because really, how do you expect a stubborn 26-year-old mother to know the first thing about that something she seriously lacks?

I have a feeling discipline is one aspect—and the most important one, at that— of motherhood that I’m really going to have problems with.

Wish me luck! I’m gonna need it!

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Time flies when you have a baby

They weren’t kidding when they said “time flies.”

Just before she turned 10 months last week, my daughter Celestine learned to stand on her own. No more holding on her baby fence, no more leaning on the walls and no more help from us. Celestine stood for a minute and  balanced on her two feet.  Now she does it every chance she gets.

Suddenly, Celestine could do all sorts of things by herself. No more lullabies from mom because she can now sleep on her own, too! No more holding up the feeding bottle anymore for her, because she can now do it herself–willingly. (This is actually a late milestone, she could hold a bottle but refused to. Haha!)

She acts like a toddler and she isn’t even a year old yet.

I know mothers ask this all the time, and now I’m asking it myself: where the hell did time go?

I remember when Elle was just a few months old and I was a new mom lacking decent sleep and tired as hell from hourly feeding, washing the bottles, laundrying the clothes, pumping the milk (and the list goes on), I kept wanted skip all the hard part and fast forward to the time when she could walk or her own and not depend on me too much. I thought it would be less exhausting if I didn’t have to carry her all the time, sang and danced her to sleep or be the one to feed her every so often. Fellow moms have heard me rant I was constantly told to enjoy these early times. Yeah right, I said to myself, tell that to the exhausted mother.

But as she slowly started weaning from me, it hit me. I don’t want her to grow up yet! I want my clingy baby! I suddenly missed those times when she would willingly let me carry her on my arms, when she could still sleep while I danced her around or when she wouldn’t close her eyes unless she heard me humming. With Celestine being a very active little one, I can tell you she hates it when I lay her on arms for a cuddle and she doesn’t like being carried around to sleep. She wants to do things her way–she’d lie down when she wants to and sleep how she wants to–at10 months old! She’s growing up to be a healthy and smart baby waaaaay too fast! I can just imagine how it would be one she hits her “terrible twos.”

Now I wish I had spent less time getting annoyed that I didn’t get enough sleep, listened to those moms and just enjoyed Celestine as a little baby as much as I could.

So how did you stop yourself from crying the first time you realized your baby isn’t a baby anymore?


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Covering the Mommy Beat

This blog wasn’t supposed to happen.

In between the editor/reporter duties at work and the mommy duties at home, there really isn’t much time left for anything else.

But that’s just my lame excuse.

The truth is, I’m not sure I’m that type of mother—that straight-out-of-an-infant-formula-commercial-who-couldn’t-do-wrong kind—that you’d want to read.

Here’s what has been my life for the last 9 months in a nutshell: On days that my daughter wakes up in middle of the night to play, I get grumpy. When she doesn’t give me any sleep, I complain. When she’s irritable the whole day, I sometimes run out of strength and patience to keep up.

So what story do I have to tell?

Tons.

I want to share with you a life of a young mother who has a patience of an unruly toddler, hung up on her career and afraid that motherhood would overtake her life, BUT also mother who, even amid her constant whining, would wake up whichever time of day, do anything at the drop of a hat, give up whatever it needs for her daughter’s sake.

As I cover this mommy beat, I will take you on my adventures with my lovely daughter Celestine, from our 3 a.m. playtimes (and having to wake up 3 hours for work!), my love-hate relationship with her newly acquired teeth to all her adorable shenanigans, but not without sharing you stories (some horror, some not) of my experiences and discoveries as a mother who’s still got craploads to learn.